Changing Me

You said You would 

change me

It came as a shock

I thought I was perfect 

Scales over my eyes

Deaf to Your voice

I thought I knew You

Hard to admit,

but I never did

Oh how I was deceived

I said all the right words

Knew my bible by heart

Yet I did not live it

I flowed in Your gifts

Yet I did not know You

I only knew what others 

told me of You

Looked through blurred lenses

While You were waiting for 

me to know You intimately

It would have happened 

sooner if I was brave enough 

to face my fears

You knew me better 

than anyone else

I lived in a bubble

A dark cloud followed 

me everywhere 

I had so many issues

I thought this was my lot

Passing down a baton of religion 

to the next generations

Oh how I was blinded

I held on to temporary fixes

Yet every time pain would 

come knock on my 

hearts door

Healing and breakthrough 

were waiting in the letting 

go of everything I held dear

The price You asked me to 

pay was too high

Then You

unannounced 

disrupted my life

You got my attention

Separated me unto Yourself 

Here I found myself facing 

every fear

That I for so long chose 

to ignore

When You looked at me

You saw the blood washed daughter You created me to be

You saw my journey of healing 

and dying many deaths

You saw me scared and crying 

and longing for the familiar 

You knew with You by my side 

I could eliminate every demon

In my deepest pain 

You interceded for me

You never let go of my hand

Not even when I begged You to

When I broke through the barricades trying to stop me

You were the Light 

surrounding me

That was the day I discovered 

that all I ever needed was 

You loving me

In my denial and selfishness 

In my rebellion and pride

You reached out to me

Using my deepest challenges 

and pain 

To bring me back to You

I will never comprehend 

the love You have for me

I wanted You to change 

everyone around me

In my ignorance I thought 

I was perfect

In Your kindness You 

reached out to me

You are so, so good to me!

~ Ebigale Wilson

Changing Me

The Journey

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Beautiful Daughters

Beautified daughters are 

taking their place 

Like caterpillars we were transformed into butterflies

Ready to spread our wings

Suddenly we were summoned 

to this place of transformation

We said yes without hesitation

Though most were caught in challenging situations

We did not hesitate 

We did not look back

We did not negotiate 

We surrendered everything 

for the most important journey

Scared at first,

we took the first steps

In a direction opposite

from which we came 

A sacred path

Paved by Papa

That would eventually bring 

us to a place of fullness in Christ 

Deep pain in the cutting 

away of old mindsets

We kept our focus through 

the different processes

We learned how to overcome 

the noise in our minds

Learned how pivotal

each lesson learned was

As we moved further into 

uncharted territories 

We ran into His unprecedented greatness and splendour 

We gave birth to faith

with no boundaries

And discovered a Love that 

can make time stand still

We laid down our lives

Our reputation

Our will

Laid down our dreams 

Stood with empty hands, 

but peace in our hearts

In this new place we are entering nothing of the old will do

Something sacred,

set in stone

was birthed through 

our broken lives

A new breed will now arise

Focused on purpose

And not on her pain

New lenses she looks through 

Peace that surpasses all understanding her new 

dwelling place

We know the time of the 

fulfillment of our dreams 

is here

We are right on time

We are waiting on Papa’s 

footsteps

The voice we cannot

exist without

To lead us further into His 

dreams and purposes for us

This is the time that so many 

before us, were waiting for!

~ Ebigale Wilson

Beautiful Daughters

The Journey

Life Changing Love

Through my darkest seasons

You never left my side

Holding my hand,

when I stood alone

Wiping my tears,

when I couldn’t go on

Interceding for me,

when I couldn’t pray

When I was too weak to fight

You were on the front lines

My Mighty Warrior

who never loses a fight

Day after day

Month after month

My faith grew wings

I was amazed by Your love

Forever changed by Your heart

Longing to go deeper still

Faith takes me to places

I never knew existed in You

Blind faith was birthed 

during dark times

In a God, I never saw

Yet, I see His hand

at work in my life

I know the fragrance

of His presence

The sound of His voice

Papa’s love healed every part

of my broken heart

In my highs and my lows

My deepest pain

and my joys

At times when giving up 

looked so appealing

He picks me up

Sings love songs over me

Reminding me of

His covenant with me

Indescribable is Papa’s love 

towards me

I couldn’t, but trust 

in a God so amazing

Supernatural peace birthed 

in the darkest of days

A reckless faith

I never knew could exist

A heart awakened

Longing only after

her One True Love

He takes me to places

I never thought I would visit

Higher and higher

I go with the One

who holds the whole world

in His hands

Yet, He chose

to chase after 

every hurting soul.

What love is this?

I may never know, but I know I was forever changed and overtaken by 

a God so amazing!

Papa never gives up

on His daughters!

He lures us into

His marvelous light

Where He heals our hearts

We only know who we are 

when we encounter Love

Everything we need is found 

in His transforming love!

Then we pass on the baton 

to daughter’s still in chains

Sharing our testimonies of 

the power of the Blood and 

His life changing love!

So that they too can be changed 

by Papa’s transforming love!

~ Ebigale Wilson

Life Changing Love

The Journey

Turn Your Back On Worry

May you have the faith to cast your cares upon Jesus.

May you truly believe that He cares deeply for you.

May you have the grit to turn your back on worry and the holy growl to put fear under your feet.

May you embrace the peace that God provides and walk in the grace that He freely offers you.

May you believe that His promises are true for you.

You’re someone He loves.

Travel light today.

Sleep well tonight.

~ Fenich Jerry

Nightmares

brutal,

terrifyingly realistic

as I wake up calling out

someone’s name

in sheer panic

cause my dream

says they’re dead

while in fact they’re still

asleep in bed;

it’s 4am and I am

crying uncontrollably

cause I’m telling you

I now am confused,

is my dream reality

and my reality a dream…

I get mixed up

and it takes me awhile

to realize what’s real,

to calm myself down…

I am grieving a loss

that hasn’t happened;

my dream points to

intruder,

gun,

victim,

but reality is ok

although I don’t know

what’s real and

what’s not;

I’ve gotten to the point

where I dread sleep

cause I know my fears

will bleed me awake

.

.

.

.

Bethany Anne

Nightmares

Our Flesh Crucified

Oh how many times have 

I begged Papa to take my 

bitter cup away

I wished for a normal life

With no ups and downs

No trials and tribulations

Oh how I wished I could 

just cruise through life!

I envied other women’s journeys

With no major storms

No time spent in the furnace

No demons to fight

Many cruise through life

While it seems like I am 

always in a battle

Or just exiting one

Looking back I am glad 

Papa ignored my plight

Through my painful journey 

I discovered my purpose

I gleaned and grew from 

every dark time

Papa used my enemies 

to train me

To form His heart and character within me

Papa’s plans are only to 

prosper us

Never to harm us

The wilderness can be 

our most fruitful time

Only when we surrender 

to the process

We lean into Papa

Seek His presence

Even when the attacks 

rage around us

We live from our spirit 

Where deep only follows 

the voice of Deep

Our flesh crucified

We know our lives are safe 

in His hands

Papa will bring us to the 

place of birthing every dream

He has for us!!!

Our challenging journeys 

might seem hard and endless

When we think we have 

arrived 

Papa says no, there’s more 

to learn

More idols to let go of

Till our hearts are healed

And Papa’s presence is embedded in us

We look through different lenses 

at life

We are thankful for each 

dark time, each enemy

Valuable lessons were learned

We paid each price Papa 

asked of us

To give birth to yoke breaking testimonies

The wilderness builds our faith in unimaginable ways

Every person powerfully used

by God

Had to go through the pit, palace and prison

Till we pass every character and heart test

Till we can say “You meant evil against me, but God meant it for my good!!!”

~ Ebigale Wilson

Our Flesh Crucified

Her Heart Was Healed

She was searching for someone 

to heal her

To look pass the smile 

on her face

To see the longing to 

belong in her eyes 

A heart broken into a 

thousand pieces

No one saw behind her 

fake smiles

Though the pain in her heart

was on her lips

Loud and clear the negative 

sound vibrated

Yet ears could not hear and

eyes could not see

For they too weren’t free

She gave her heart to 

everyone offering her

a glimmer

of love

She loved without boundaries

She gave love her all

Surrounded by flawed 

human beings

Who could not give her what she desperately needed

Years went by, but the hurt remained

Like a dagger through 

her heart

Severe was the pain

Depression, sorrow, anxiety 

She lived through them all.

Would her heart ever taste 

contentment and peace?

Temporary fixes made it worse

No one took the time to show her, her worth

She never knew Papa held 

the keys to all her voids

She never basked in His healing presence

She never tasted the transforming love 

of our Father

Till the day she reached 

her lowest point

Darkness stole so much

of her

She had nowhere to turn

Only to Papa

She was amazed how she looked through His eyes

She traded her rags for a beautiful dress

Her heart was healed

Her life transformed

Papa’s love searches for the broken, the downtrodden, 

the rejected

He specializes in transforming lives,

Making powerful testimonies out 

of broken lives.

~ Ebigale Wilson

Her Heart Was Healed

The Journey

Struggle

today

I feel the struggle

a bit more,

I see nothing

but gray enveloping

this damaged warrior

as I’m standing upon

shaky ground;

I appear to be okay,

but inside this mind

I’m at war with memories

I just want to forget

as I can’t stop reliving them,

I want to wake up

from this unending nightmare;

although I’m feeling drained,

I know He will give me

the strength I need

to withstand this

battle forcing the earth

to swallow the blood shed

as I cling to His truth,

knowing full well

His love will carry me through.

~ Bethany Anne

Struggle