Running away
from Your holy presence
The story of my life
I would not listen
to Your voice
drawing me in
Calling me to come closer
Begging me to not let the enemy in
Sin drew me in
Her enticing speech
caused me to yield
The strong man I once was
descending now to death
The enemy showed me the beginning
Withholding the end of my destination
I did not give ear to the voices
trying to warn me
What would they know?
Life is too short
It is all about my flesh and fantasies
I was made for so much more
than the mediocre life I live
Normal is not for me
That is what her lips
made me believe
The road less travelled I will forego
She told me I was made for greater things
That my current life is but a waste
I believed her lies
Ignoring what was important
I chose to pay a very high price
For momentarily things
My selfishness setting me
on a path of destruction
I was captivated by her beauty
Her smooth lips drew me in
The warning signs went off
but I was caught in her web
Her lips smoother than oil
Told me this path
would lead to life
Like a lamb led to be slaughtered
I willingly obey
She made sin look so appealing
I took her lies for truth
Wisdom and instruction
hidden far away
My pride made all the rules
I did not know eventually
her feet go down to death
Her door would lead me
straight to hell
Oh how I have hated instruction
The pictures she painted
of happiness and wealth
Put me in a trance
I had lots of cheerleaders
encouraging me to sin
While proclaiming they know God
Living double lives of compromise
How could I be so dumb?
Will I ever recover my losses
Will I ever regain my name
Far from God
in the pigpen
I awaken out of this trance
I never thought that sin
would bring me to this place
Ashamed, alone
the voices of my encouragers
now grew still
Where is all the promises
of glitter and gold?
All my fantasies
went down the drain
The grass that looked so green
Eventually grew pale
Oh how I have hated instruction!
I have lost my pride and integrity
On the verge of total ruin
I gave my years away
to the cruel one
Precious time
down the drain
I don’t have much to say
Life was all about me
How selfish I have been
My needs and wants important
Mammon became my god
With Jezebel my queen
Leading me further and further astray
Gone the man I once have been
God brought me to my knees
The scales fell off my eyes
My life flashed like a nightmare
I could not continue in sin
The enemy lost his hold
Running away from His light
my biggest regret
Many were praying for God
to open my eyes
I will forever be grateful
To a God who is always
in search of me
Although the stench
of the pigpen clings to me
His love looks past my sin
and sees my brokenness
His love pursues
and heals my heart
His love erases my sinful past
I will run back to my Father
Repent and embrace His grace
His love will transform me
into the son
He created me to be
He is still the God
who will leave the ninety nine
In search of one lost soul.
~ Ebigale Wilson
One Lost Soul
The Journey